I couldn't have asked for a more profoundly beautiful birthday or Easter. "Guiyang only sees the sun once every five days" was a common thing I was told upon coming here, and has proven to be true. This weekend, however, the sun has not stopped shining for two days straight, which I've never seen the entire time I've lived here. Weather in the 60s and 70s, I was able to wear skirts and celebrate the days in good spirits.
Yesterday, I turned twenty-three. Twenty-three has been an age I've looked forward to ever since I was nineteen living in South Africa and Nele, my Belgian roommate, turned twenty-three and I couldn't wait to have the knowledge and beauty and independence she possessed. It is also, I recently discovered (I'm sure I knew this before, but I forgot as math is not something I like to do regularly) the age my mom was when she had me. It being a special birthday, I'm so pleased to say that I could not have handpicked a better day! After talking with my family for a good two hours in the morning, the moment we hung up the phone I immediately got a call from Jess telling me she was on her way to my apartment. We spent the morning hiking through Longdongbao, I showed her the uniquely stellar grave site hidden in Longdongbao's midst, and then we went to the honey farm—my first time going there—across from me and she bought me some local honey (which is the first delicious honey I've had in this country—usually water and/or sugar are added to expand the product but this honey was not tampered with). We spent lunch at my favorite restaurant (owned by the Chinese Muslim family who has been teaching me their language and is so overly kind to me), and then headed over to Kim's home, where we were joined by a large group of other volunteers (some who came from out of town) for egg dying fun and gift exchange. Everyone was so generous and put so much thought into their gifts! Homemade scarf, pillow for my mattress collection, American candies and sweets, Kim even made me a "coupon book" like I used to make for my parents, filled with amazing favors, girls' dates, massages and homemade delights...It was all so kind! They then treated me to an outstanding (and expensive!!) pizza restaurant, followed by ice cream at a new DU (the Australian version of Dairy Queen—not quite as good, but definitely the best ice cream we've had in China) ice cream parlor. The night was topped off by gathering at Todd and Jess's home, followed by a slumber party with Bethany and me at Kim's house. Really, a perfect birthday!
Today, Easter Sunday, Bethany joined me for fellowship service in Guiyang. Like the Christmas service, this was a prayer service for all Christians in Guizhou. While there, Bethany (who lives in Anshun, a town about 1.5 hours away) ran into two of her coworkers, so she introduced me to them. While talking, one of the women casually asked "so where are you from?" and I said "Iowa, from a small town called Dubuque" (no one ever knows Dubuque, so I usually don't even mention it), and she gasped, then told me "I'M from Dubuque! I grew up in Sherill!" Her name is Kris Frieburger and she's been living in Guizhou for the past nine years (before moving to Anshun, she lived in Guiyang for a few years)!!! She even graduated from Hempstead (my former high school) in '93. I could not believe it! In all my travels, I have met, if I were to be generous, maybe two or three people from Iowa, but I never conceived the possibility of meeting someone from Dubuque! Let alone, I still cannot fathom this, in Guizhou! NO ONE comes to Guizhou, and so few foreigners live here!
Following fellowship, everyone gathered for a large brunch and I met some amazing people from the Netherlands and Belgium (who also grew up in the same places as Nele—mentioned above—and my other friends I studied with in South Africa) and a Dutch girl who studied at the same place as me in South Africa, only one year after I did. What an inconceivably small planet!
Bethany and I, after I decided Easter was a day for skipping Chinese class, decided to spend the rest of the afternoon by the river sitting in the sun. We spent the entire day talking entirely from the heart, which is something I haven't done in a long time and it really helped make us both feel very centered and, for the first time in almost nine months, completely as though we are in the right place. While I know this feeling won't last forever, and I'll probably always struggle with this place, it was nice to be reminded that China has benefited me a great deal. Living here is, without a doubt, the most testing thing I've ever had to do. It has confronted every aspect of my life and I've been forced to come to terms with who I really am and to realize what a profound influence my culture has had on me, and then to acknowledge that everything I see and dislike about China because I've thought it was "bad" or "disgusting" or "immoral", "strange", "intolerable", "wrong" etc. is NOT, in fact, any of those things; it is simply the opposite of what my culture has taught me to know. That does not make it wrong, it simply is different, and I think I'm finally (it look me long enough, eh?) coming to terms with that. I think there is no place in the world as different from the United States as southwestern China, and that has been such a tremendous challenge for me. It has, however, humbled me beyond belief. Before coming here, I did excel at almost anything I attempted, and most things (cooking, math and science aside) did come easily for me. I thought I knew who I was, what I wanted, and life was great because it was not a challenge. It was fun and familiar and even the "brave" things I did were not challenging because it was what I wanted to do. China, southwestern China specifically, has been the biggest step outside of myself I could ever imagine, and I think that's why I've struggled so much with being here. Finally, after almost nine months, I'm ready to take Guizhou as it is, and to say that perhaps it is me who needs to adjust (this may seem like a no-brainer, but it really was difficult for me to realize). I am finally glad that I am here. If I had gone to Africa (or even Latin America or other Asian countries, or virtually any other place in the world, for that matter), I would, of course, have to step outside myself, but never in such a drastic manner. Southwestern China has been good for me, more so than I could perhaps ever be good for It, and I'm finally able to acknowledge and recognize that.
Now, after a beautiful day and weekend of introspection and positive karma, I am going to head downstairs to the Laplante family (my "mom and dad" of China—the ones who took care of me when I was sick and have a daughter my age back in Canada) to eat my chocolate birthday cupcakes Marilyn made for me. :) Until the next "down slide" I have (and I know I will have one, because that's part of the difficulty of me living here), I am happy.
Happy Easter, Wonderful Family and Friends!!!
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